Working mothers often feel like they are participating in two different rat races. When they’re in the office, they worry about reports, meetings, deadlines, and what to wear to cocktails tonight. When they are at home, they balance checkbooks, review their children’s homework, worry about a child’s Halloween costume, and plan what they will serve for Saturday’s dinner with the in-laws.
It’s exhausting, stressful, and ultimately confusing. Things fall through the cracks. “Oh, was it my turn to bring cookies to this month’s PTA meeting?” “Oh no, I forgot my mother’s birthday!” “What do you mean you need a costume for tomorrow?”
Here are some tips to help working moms stay on track:
* Maintain a consolidated planner. While most working moms have a business calendar, with carefully laid out meetings and deadlines, they often forget to include personal appointments like vaccination schedules, a relative’s birthday, or soccer practice. Instead of keeping your family calendar and your office planner separate, keep your notes in one place. You can use color-coded pencils or, for convenience, use an online or digital planner so you can review your schedules neatly and efficiently.
* Don’t trust your memory. Even the most organized working mom will have a hard time remembering everything that needs to be completed on any given day. Leave reminders where you can see them and where you are most likely to look, even when you are most frantic. Stick it on your car dashboard or bathroom mirror, not the already cluttered bulletin board. Stick an important document on the inside cover of your briefcase. Or better yet, set up your digital planner to send email reminders or create pop-ups on your desktop.
* Never overbook. If you find that your to-do list has gotten out of hand and your meetings tend to overlap, then it is a sign that you are not allocating enough time for delays or obstacles. If you think you will only need one afternoon to complete the report, allot two in case someone schedules an emergency meeting. Then delegate the tasks you won’t have time for given your most realistic schedule.
* Resist the urge to do everything. Working moms, let go of the superwoman myth! Not only is it impossible to do everything, it shouldn’t. You need quality time, with your child, your partner, yourself, and that means putting aside tasks that are not important. Can you ask your sister to bake cookies for the PTA conference this Saturday? That gives you an extra hour to cuddle with your toddler instead of slaving away in the kitchen. Can you cascade information through email instead of scheduling a meeting? You save yourself (and everyone else involved) an hour when you can finish another report or clean up your files.
* Pencil at that time “I”. When you’re stressed and busy, you tend to put yourself last on the list, just so you can keep up with your responsibilities to other people. This is the worst decision you can make. The busier you are, the more you’ll have to recharge, even if it’s half an hour to soak in the tub or sneak out to the salon to paint your nails pink. Work hard, but also play hard, you deserve it.