Some people make appointments to see their therapist in person, others choose online counseling. As a counselor and therapist who offers both, my experience is that neither is better or worse than the other, they are just different. Each therapy approach has its own advantages and benefits.

When there is no ‘body language’, the focus is on therapy

Some people have the idea that because online counselors don’t see body language, they are at a disadvantage in their work and may not be as effective as face-to-face counselors. But how important is ‘body language’ when compared to what is said and heard? Online therapeutic conversations actually have the potential to be more focused than a discussion between therapist and client in the same room. The distractions of how someone is sitting, what they are wearing, and what else is going on in the room are simply not present during online dating.

Of course, ‘body language’ can give the counselor a better idea of ​​a person, but it can also be influenced by the situation itself. A person meeting with a therapist in an unfamiliar office may seem physically uncomfortable, perhaps more so than if the consultation took place online.

Obviously, there are some differences between being in the same room as a therapist and meeting with them online. But such limitations must be balanced against the extra attention words and language receive when delivered from a comfortable position and in a familiar setting such as home.

Online Counseling: Different Options for Different People

Online advice is not just an approach. It encompasses a number of options that each have their own advantages.

  • Webcam: Face-to-face counseling over the Internet

The most recognized approach to talk therapy over the Internet is probably webcam counseling. Webcam counseling means that you and the therapist see each other face to face, as if you were in the same room together. So instead of talking about online counseling and ‘face-to-face’ counseling, I like to use the terms ‘online counseling’ and ‘in-person counseling’, because webcam counseling IS face-to-face.

There is no doubt that many people enjoy the comfort and convenience of meeting a therapist via webcam. You don’t need to think about transportation, traffic or what you are wearing. You save time because you don’t even need to leave home. All you need is a working computer with a webcam, Internet access, and a quiet, private place. You can see and talk to your therapist confidently and relaxed in your own space. If you don’t want to be seen, you can choose to talk without the video, which is like telephone counseling.

  • instant messaging advice

Different people like the idea of ​​Internet therapy for different reasons. The convenience of not having to leave home can be appealing, but the privacy and confidentiality of online conversations is also a draw for many.

Instant messaging software such as Skype and Windows Messenger make it possible to participate in therapy without being seen or heard. Writing down your problems and having your therapist respond with questions or reflections on what she has written can be a refreshing alternative to having to give voice to difficult experiences. This can be very important for someone who experiences shyness or has difficulty talking to a stranger. An added feature of the software is that it automatically saves a transcript of the conversation on your computer that you can choose to delete at any time. The advantage here is that you can read the transcript to refresh your memory of what was said at any time after the session is over and refer to the dialogue at your next appointment if you have any questions. Research has shown that documenting what happened can make therapy sessions much more effective.

  • Email Counseling

Email counseling has been around for some time. It offers the convenience of not having to leave your home, the privacy of not being seen or heard, and the added bonus that you can choose to write on your own time.

Some people feel pressed for time when they are in a room with a therapist. This pressure is removed with email advice. Exchanging emails with your therapist means you can think about what you want to say, take your time writing it down, and then, when you get a response from the professional, you can read it on your own time. Email counseling takes the rush out of therapy. And everything the therapist says is documented, which is another guarantee for you.

The benefit of options in therapy

I’ve heard some critics argue that online counseling is a poor substitute for in-person counseling, too risky, or even that it shouldn’t be legal to practice.

We have already covered how different approaches to online therapy have their own advantages that can outweigh “body language” and other specific disadvantages in some situations. As far as risks or other concerns, I think it’s important to note that Internet-based therapy makes counseling and therapeutic support possible for many people who might not otherwise be ready to commit to a therapist.

Many people who have consulted me through online dating may not even have tried counseling if online options were not available. Should these people be denied access to counseling just because they are not prepared to sit in an unfamiliar space with a stranger they have never met?

Online counseling and therapy are inevitably the direction that much therapeutic practice will take in the future. Internet-based talk therapy has the potential to help many people because it is comfortable, private, and actually puts the consumer back in control.

Risk, safety and efficacy in Internet-based counseling

Despite the best attempts at trying to regulate the practice of counseling and therapy, paying for any service will always be, to some extent, a matter of ‘buyer beware’.

Choose a counselor or therapist who is a member of an accredited professional association and is insured to practice. Membership in a professional body means that the professional has some degree of responsibility for her work. You can also check with the association to make sure they are who they say they are.

If you have any particular concerns, write them down and send them to the therapist or request a preliminary conversation to discuss these issues. These may include issues such as qualifications, privacy and confidentiality, technical issues, and payment. I encourage people to find a counselor or therapist they feel comfortable with, just as you would if you had to choose a new doctor, mechanic, or decorator.

In terms of who you should and shouldn’t see an online counselor, there are no hard and fast rules for this. In my own practice, I do not make myself available to people who are in significant risk or personal danger or if the situation is of extreme urgency. I’m working with people from all over the world, so I’m not in a position to easily recruit local emergency services. If the situation is recent domestic violence or sexual assault, for example, I direct people to contact a GP or the nearest public hospital. Medical professionals and institutions often have much better resources to find the most appropriate help for anyone in such a situation.

Who are the most suitable clients for online advice?

You don’t need to be isolated or disabled or even short on time to choose an online therapist. Meeting with a therapist or counselor over the Internet can be just as effective as seeing a doctor in the same room. Online counseling is suitable for those with issues such as anxiety or depression, relationship problems, concerns about sexuality, confidence, shyness, addiction, career problems or burnout, or difficulties with direction and purpose in life. In fact, anything that can be discussed with a therapist in person can be explored with a competent and professional online therapist.