Do you have an inspiring symbol of hope or tranquility? Do you use it as a cue to increase your self-awareness and alter the way you feel at any given moment? The great psychologist Carl Jung once wrote: “Only symbolic life can express the need of the soul, the daily need of the soul, mind you!” We all have soul needs, especially when we are grieving. Wearing a personal symbol will help you meet this deep inner need and will have an immense effect on the focus of your thought life.
Symbols carry great meaning when grieving and are powerful sources to turn to in coping with loss. Visual reminders and pictures have always been powerful motivators and stimulants. Archibald MacLeish, American poet and Pulitzer Prize winner, has argued that symbols move us more than ideas. A personal symbol will alert you to do something about your current condition; it will give direction to your life. Use it to pull it out of a downward spiral twist.
Pick a symbol that reminds you of the beliefs, goals, new skills, behaviors, or routines you want to establish. Or, you can use it as a signal to put aside unfinished business, any conflicts you may have had with the deceased, or to say a prayer or repeat an important affirmation. The color, shape, and material of the symbol can also be used to recall spiritual truths and specific events that stimulate inspiring thoughts.
Anyone can learn to find comfort through the use of motivational symbols, which are essentially reminders to change behavior. The key to successful use is twofold: choose the appropriate visual reminder for what you want to achieve and develop the awareness to immediately employ the optimistic response you associate with it, in the moment of need. If you change your current state of concentration, you will in fact control your feelings and emotions.
Here is a partial list of suggestions for possible symbols that you can choose from.
1. A quote from your favorite author. Over 40 years ago, I read a book called Heart of a Champion by Olympic pole vault champion Bob Richards. Here is a quote that I have always remembered: “The determining factor in life is not ability, it is what you think you can do. You can stretch all aspects of your being if you are dedicated.”
2. A favorite memory put on canvas, drawn, or sketched.
3. Any object that belonged to the deceased or that the deceased had bought for him.
4. An emblem designed with a personal message that only you will know its meaning. Here’s an example: IWALU (I will always love you).
5. Frame a line or two of a poem to hang in a special place in your home or office. One of my favorites is Will by Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850-1919) and these three lines:
No chance, no destiny, no luck
Can circumvent, hinder or control
The firm determination of a determined soul.
6. A quilt made from clothing worn by the loved one.
7. A heart-shaped stone or another stone found on the seashore. Make it, or whatever small object you like, put it in Lucite and put it on a shelf or table.
8. A photo of a place you visited with your loved one or a magazine clipping.
9. A zipper clamp attached to the zipper of a coat or keychain.
10. Pocket chips.
The death of loved ones leaves a lasting mark, and your loss will force you to become a more complete person, wiser, and more understanding of the need for love, discovery, and a changing vision. Symbols will put you in touch with that inherent wisdom while nurturing your spirit. So take the time to use your imaginative muscle and create a symbol that will stir your depths and strengthen your inner life.